Oh where oh where can you be?

So it's been about a month of not journaling and feeling completely out of control to realize I need control. I need to blog, I need to excercise, I need to eat healthy... let's do some catching up with some realizations

Realization #1 Just because someone looks happy doesn't mean that they are.

A few weeks ago I went out with some girlfriends from work... we went to a local bar. Now briefly these girls seem so happy and confident (they are overweight about my size to be exact). So I thought hanging out with them might be good for my confidence... however, not at all what I thought. The whole time they were complaining!! The whole time! Whether it was about their bodies, their relationships or lack of, or being hungry, just anything. I sat amazed at these girls, which led into realization #2.

Realization #2 If you don't realize how lucky you are, perk up your ears and you will soon.

As I was listening to all this complaining I realized wow, Justin and I don't have those problems, wow I wouldn't look like that in that outfit (I would look phenomenal), I can resist the urge to order food when I'm at a restaurant and not fill up on greasy fries and onion rings. As all these things were making themselves evident my shoulders became pulled back, my head was held higher. I started to feel really great about myself. Now most people would say that is extremely selfish but it's really not when you think about it. All they allowed me to do was put things in perspective and realize that my life is not as bad as I like to imagine it being.

Realization #3 People give up in relationships far too easily.

Over the past couple of weeks I have spent a couple of nights out with friends and family. During this time I have come ti realize that people surrender in relationships far too easily and far too fast. For example, while hanging out with my sister, she mentioned thinking about getting a divorce because her husband won't quit smoking. Now this really gets to me because my brother (in law) gives in to just about everything she wants, puts his head down and does it. He really tries, sometimes he just doesn't get it but 9 times out of 10 what she wants is what goes. And now just because he is having a hard time quitting smoking after like 15 years she wants to divorce him (btw she quit 2 years ago). I mean he really is trying he even has medication from the doctor to quit. So I think that was just a poor excuse to run to the lawyers.

Realization #4 People do not respect others as they should... whatever happened to the "Golden Rule" we learned in kindergarten???

This past weekend was the yearly highly important carnival in my home city River Rouge. It used to be a lot of clean fun, boat races, baby contests, kareoke, and so on. Now it is all about secret drug deals and leaving the beer tent with someone to get lucky with. Well I decided I don't do drugs and I am married so hey why not check it out. Some of my old friends were up there. So I got my sexy on (dammit I'll post a picture later!! When my friends posts them) and headed up there. Sn: I went to the gym before everytime I went out these past weeks it boosts my confidence SO MUCH! So anyway, we were at the beer tent and when you're a beautiful woman as I am men (pigs) will literally drool all over you. My father was a cop before he passed away and all his old work buddies dropped their jaws when I walked in. How disrespectful. I grew up around you, you probably watched my dad change my freaking diaper ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! Well then throughout the night people were drunk and sloppy and rude. For one, you don't know me I will hurt you if you try to disrespect me. For two, your sloppy drunk and I am not I have much more control than you.

Realization #5 People in a relationship should not use certain words to demean their SO

After having been with Justin for 3 years he has taught me to not use certain words toward your significant other, words such as bitch or asshole. You should not use those words, however, I didn't really understad the important of this lesson until recently when my friend and her fiance got into it and he kept calling her a bitch. It is impossible to love someone and call them a bitch. It is so disrespectful, it is so demeaning. I just can't believe someone can love someone and talk to them in that way.

I think that is all for my realizations for right now...

I have been working my ass off at the gym, however food hasn't really fallen in line.. so hopefully it can all fall in place and we can be happy. I am seeing changes in my body just not on the scale.